My purpose of writing this piece is to expose some sugarcoated lies around pornography.
Don’t fall into the trap of believing that porn is harmless entertainment that has no impact on individuals or society.
Get educated through this write-up and let us all fight against an industry that is tangibly harming individuals, relationships, families and society.
We deserve better than what porn has to offer. We deserve real love, untainted by the toxicity of pornography.
Addictions, whether to alcohol, food, drugs, pornography or gambling, are destructive to families, because addicts become so focused on getting the next “fix” that they neglect spouse, children and friends.
There are eight reasons why you must stop the twin effect of pornography and masturbation before it becomes too late.
They Ruin Your Sex-Life
Porn can damage your sex life and sexual health. Hear this: Pornography doesn’t support sex; it ruins it. Pornography is designed and edited with an unrealistic idea of what sex is all about.
But the fact is that porn reshapes expectations about sex and attraction by presenting an unrealistic picture.
In porn, performers always look their best. They are forever young, surgically enhanced, airbrushed and photoshopped to perfection. Many women that have become victims of their spouses’ voracious appetite for porn believe strongly that porn has changed men’s expectations of how women should look.
Porn leads to less sex and to less sexual satisfaction within a relationship. Researchers have shown a strong connection between porn use and low sex drive, erectile dysfunction and trouble reaching orgasm.
They Waste Your Productive Energy
Pornography and masturbation would make you seek ways of releasing your energy, instead of putting it to productive use.
Energy is the ability to do work and the more frequent you release it away through the habits of masturbation and pornography, the less productive work you would accomplish.
Your sexual energy is the greatest and most potent form of energy available to you. You can either squander it or utilise it to its fullest potential and let it supercharge your life.
There is nothing in this life that drains energy more than the twin habit of pornography and masturbation.
They Can Fuel Depression And Anxiety
Contrary to the belief that pornography and masturbation ease out tension and anxiety, they actually bring more pressure than pleasure. “The more one uses pornography, the more lonely one becomes,” says Dr. Gary Brooks, a psychologist who has worked with porn addicts for the last 30 years.
Pornography fuels depression by cutting us from life supporting relationships and giving us a false feeling of comfort.
They Destroy Your Social Life
People addicted to pornography and masturbation keep a lot to themselves. It is not a bad thing to keep to oneself sometimes, but pornography would make you cross a dangerous boundary. It makes your prefer seclusion and isolation to associating with others.
People that involve more in pornography always love to keep to themselves and seldom ask for help.
Pornography Destroys Relationships And Intimacy
One of the critical things that sustain relationship is connection. One way through which pornography destroys relationship is in the area of connection.
The sexual relationship gets cheapened when connection ceases to be the goal, as couples drift apart, particularly as most of the viewing is done in secret.
Research shows that pornography use is linked to less stability in relationships, increased risk of infidelity and greater likelihood of divorce. Men who are exposed to porn find their partners less sexually attractive and rate themselves as less in love with their partners.
They Destroy Creativity
Pornography and masturbation are wrong ways of using our creativity. I have observed in my many years of helping youths overcome pornography and masturbation that most of the victims of these destructive habits are creative people.
I want to say emphatically that masturbation and pornography are twin attacks on your creativity. They both deplete your reservoir of creativity.
Porn Is Inseparably Connected To Sexual Abuse And Violence
Most of the scenes in porn videos project a form of abuse and violent displays.
People addicted to porn are most times unconsciously influenced to behave in the same manner in real life. These violent deposits in porn addicts can push them to be abusive in their relationships.
Exposure to pornography has been shown to make viewers less compassionate toward victims of sexual violence and exploitation. The vast majority of porn portrays men as powerful and in charge, while women are submissive and obedient.
Watching scene after scene of dehumanising submission makes it start to seem normal. It sets the stage for lopsided power dynamics in couple relationships and the gradual acceptance of verbal and physical aggression against women.
Pornography Affects Your Relationship With God
One of the habits that cut you off from God is pornography. Pornography breeds spiritual instability and dryness. You cannot indulge in pornography and still be vibrant spiritually. If you want to go fast and far with God next year, then stop the habits of pornography and masturbation.
I have seven steps of helping youths overcome these twin addictions of masturbation and pornography and would briefly share it here.
Remove The Triggers
Every addiction has a trigger- something that inspires or awakens the urge. Downloaded porn videos, porn sites are triggers and porn magazines are triggers.
If you want to deal with any addiction, then you must first remove every sign of what triggers it in your environment.
Avoid Too Much Isolation
In Psychology, it is believed that addiction is a disease of isolation. Isolation, most times can empower pornography and masturbation. The urge to indulge in pornography and masturbation always come in moments of isolation. So, avoid too much isolation. A developing addiction leads to the addict becoming withdrawn, remote and emotionally distant.
Avoid Association And Companies That Empower Your Addiction
The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 15:33: “Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.” Relationships can empower and help us overcome our addictions. Avoid moving with people struggling with the addiction you are planning to come out of.
Fill Your Mind And Time With Productive Activities
Proverbs 16:27 says: “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop; idle lips are his mouthpiece.” The mind of a man cannot remain vacant for a long time unless it is occupied with fruitful ideas. It will turn to bad thoughts.
Our minds abhor vvacuum, so they must always be occupied by something or they would find something to occupy itself.
Find Social Support And Seek Help
Social support is vital to our health as human beings, as it empowers us to feel welcomed, important, loved and part of something greater. Addicts often use substances to artificially replicate feelings of importance, love and happiness.
However, the great irony is that addicts only wind up lonelier than they felt before. Attaining real social support is critical to overcoming addictions.
Hold Yourself Accountable To Someone
Accountability alone can make a drastic difference in overcoming any addiction. I have two young friends with me presently that I am helping to overcome addiction to drugs and accountability has really made a difference in trying to help them.
Seek Spiritual Intervention
I have come to understand the place of spiritual intervention in overcoming addictions. Overcoming addiction is not just only psychological; it is a spiritual battle. Seek the help of a spiritual mentor whom you trust and can be opened to. It would make a big difference.
In my interactions with youths and teens, I have observed that finding a teenager who has not been exposed to porn is a nearly impossible task. They are being taught about sex and sexuality from what they see on the Internet and graphic video games. They play at being sexual by sending and posting naked pictures to one another and performing sex acts as early as age 12.
They do all of this without the brain development to understand the long-term consequences of exposure to pornography.
I want to specially reach out to parents to take charge of enlightening their children about the danger of pornography. While porn is often called “adult material,” many of its consumers are well under the legal age. In fact, the majority of teens are getting at least some of their sex education from porn, whether they mean to or not.
Researchers are finding that porn’s influence can and does find its way into teenager’s sexual behaviours. Dear parents, beware!
“You can suffer the pain of change or suffer remaining the way you are” -Joyce Meyer
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